Please Forgive My Monkey!
The worst thing the runner can do is to compare to others.
But this is exactly what the monkey inside my head does, all the time!
She is very cunning, she always compare us with better and faster.
I have told her many times I run for fun and health, but she is not having it.
The chatter goes like this:
”How can you let this guy overtake you? You are much younger!”
”You see this girl, how come she is better than you?”
”Don’t let this dude overtake you, don’t you see he clearly doesn’t know how to run?”
And she goes again, and again. It is embarrassing and annoying.
I tried to educate her. You see, I said, there will be always faster people around us, this is just as it is. We don’t know their background, their running history. They are just better at running, and that all it is. And we do our best, we train, a lot, and we keep making steady progress.
She just looked at me, with those witty eyes and disbelief on her face. ”Is this really all you have” she said?
I have also tried meditation. It has failed as well. The cheeky monkey just sits quiet and doesn’t interfere with my ”oms” and deep breaths.
And is right back, when during the race, she sees someones back. ”Get him” she shouts, angrily.
I discovered, after many years of living with her, that my only option is to ignore her. I cannot shut her, but I don’t have to listen to her either.
So I keep doing what works for me. I train, have fun and I only compare to myself from yesterday.
So if you ever feel the envy eyes on your back, when you casually pass me during the race, remember, it wasn’t me, it was the monkey eyes! 🙂